Thursday, January 27, 2011
Being a Mom is not an easy job....
We all know this to be true, and with each kid your job description becomes more complicated, then add on a child who see the world differently than you and everyone else you have just made the list of most dangerous jobs. This morning I got a bad job review, "You are the meanest mom in the world", "I don't like you" and "I am not talking to you". Really I know I am not the only mom in the world to hear these words and I fear this won't be the last, but when you do hear them it is never pleasant. I guess the consolation to this is I struck the right cord of discipline or consequence. I will admit that discipline is hard on parents, consistency even harder but we know this to be for their own good, we do it out of love and we do it in an effort to mold them into beautiful, responsible, respectful great adults. We have always found discipline to be a bit harder with our middle, being born with a heart defect and having complications, and then various illness through her first 5 years, having almost lost her at birth, it has always been tough, we have just been so thankful she made it and the flashbacks to the hospital stay with you. On top of it we are always trying to decide wither it is disability (Aspergers) or just plain stubborn, not wanting to listen to the said task. We know her to be very stubborn and tough, part of the fight that is in her to survive, but now we have to train it for good.
So this morning, like every other morning, we are getting ready for school. We ask her to get dressed, we ask her to get her bag ready, brush teeth, wash face, comb hair.... same routine. We know she is easily distracted so we have to remind her many times. Today after warnings upon warnings, some of it being my fault because of maybe not following through as consistently as possible, I finally took away tv after school because of not listening to my requests to get dressed and pack the backpack. I decided then and there we have to crack down, their has to be consistent consequences to not listening. I tried to explain it was her choice and the whole thing that sometimes listening can protect her from getting hurt, that fell on deaf ears, so today after school we will have the talk and all will be explained and the rules will be set. I am sure we will see some extra crabbiness but in the long run it is best. I called her teacher and she is on board and supportive and is also cracking down to get through the heal digging in against learning math, she is smart and the teacher knows it. So I can not say this is going to be the best day for her or for me for that matter, but as we know there is consequence for every action and I do know that in the long run this consequence will be a positive one.